MINIMALISM

I started clearing out the clutter in my home to utilize my time in this (Corona virus Pandemic)   lock down period and I realized that there was lot of unwanted things stuffed inside the wardrobes like unwanted clothes, drawers etc like my son's toys which he no more plays with them as our children's choices keep changes as they grew. 

While I was clearing up the mess, I remembered the concept of 'Minimalism' explained by the famous bestselling author Joshua Becker (https://www.becomingminimalist.com) which I recently gone through and would like to share with you the philosophy of minimalist.

What is Minimalism?

“Simplicity, clarity, singleness: These are the attributes that give our lives power and vividness and joy as they are also the marks of great art.” —Richard Holloway

What is a minimalist lifestyle?

It means living with things you really need. It means removing anything that distracts us from living with intentionality and freedom.

I started realizing the importance of being minimalism is by my personal experience i.e by clearing out the clutter in home and by keeping and maintaining only essential things meeting our needs and reducing my screen time. Yet there are many other aspects of minimalism which I yet to explore and work on .However in short, living a simple life helps us think freely, clearly and open to the beauty.

UBUNTU

Hi Friends,

I have learned a new word 'UBUNTU' while doing web surfing and would like to share with you what I have explored early this morning.

When I get deeper and deeper in this to understand the meaning  of UBUNTU, I was thrilled to know  the beautiful concept of Humanity and came to know that many world leaders like Barrack Obama  and others acknowledged and follows the Ubuntu philosophy.

This is the word in South Africa. Ubuntu means ,'I am because because we are'. Nelson Mandela ,the President of  South Africa (1994 to 1999) introduced the Philosophy of South African 'UBUNTU' to the world.

" In Africa, there is a concept known as 'Ubuntu' -the profound sense that we are human only through the humanity of others; that if we are to accomplish anything in this world it will in equal measure be due to the work and achievement of others"  - Nelson Mandela.

I found a beautiful story in the web (source unknown) which instills positivity and togetherness in all of us which we need to teach our children to make them better human beings.

An Anthropologist proposed a game to children of an African Tribe.He put a basket of fruit near a tree and told the kids that the first one to reach the fruit would win them all. When he told them to run they all took each others hands and ran together, then sat together enjoying the fruits.When asked why they ran like that , as one could have taken all the fruits for oneself, they said " UBUNTU, how can one of us be happy if all the others are sad?". A simple concept with a powerful insight !

                                             "I AM BECAUSE WE ARE"

Discipline is the Secret to fruitful life

Picture source -https://flintobox.com/

Krishna was a fifth grade student, he was a nice boy, good at studies and sports. However, he had one bad habit i.e waking up late in the morning and doing his daily chores. Every day in the morning, his mother used to wake him up at 6 ‘o’ clock as the school bus will arrive in front of the building by 7 AM. One day, after pestering and pampering, Krishna woke up reluctantly at 6.40 AM and started getting ready in a rush , in the meanwhile bus driver started honking  in front of the house at around 6.55 AM. Mother requested the bus driver to wait ten more minutes Shouting from the Balcony and helped Krishna pack his bag, lunch box, wear uniform and boarded him the bus. Bus driver as usual used to comment and preach her to be on time whenever Krishna was late to board the bus, today it was no different day either.

After waving off his son Mother thought, ‘I cannot take this anymore, it’s so tiresome and this is the time to teach Krishna a lesson’. But since she was a loving mother she was puzzled as she didn’t wanted a punishment mode lesson which will not have a lasting effect on the mind of child. She decided something and gave a quirky smile.

In the evening when Krishna came from School, she asked him to get freshen up, have some refreshment and   complete his school homework. Krishna Said - Mother,’ I want to play with my friend’s downstairs’.

‘Krishna please do what I said.’ Mother screamed from the Kitchen. But, Krishna didn’t paid attention to mothers words and left to play.

Mother knew that it’s going to happen and decided for implementing solution for this problem.

Krishna came home after his play and asked mother to feed him food.

Krishna you are a big boy now, you need to learn to do all your jobs independently which includes having the food also.

Krishna was at his best in emotional blackmail with moist eyes Hmm.. Mother please. I will listen to you , tell me whatever you say, I will do, but please feed with your hands.  Motherly love took over and now she cannot resist to her son’s demand.

Mother Said - Hmm. Okay Krishna, then go and freshen up, drink water, finish your homework and then I will feed you.

Deal?

Hmm.. it takes so much time mother. Please feed me first then I will do.

Hmm..You are good at trading Krishna!

Ok then go freshen up and come to the dining table, I will feed you.

Krishna came in pajamas and started banging on the dining table with spoons. I Am waiting!

Mother can you please tell me a story while feeding?

Hmm.. she mixed rice and dal with clarified butter(ghee), an Indian traditional food in any household, narrating the story of jungle book  she made shapes of Mowgli, sherkhan, bageera , Bhalu etc and fed Krishna.

I love you so much Mother! Krishna was elated with the sense of joy, he was loving the new experience

Hmm.. Homework? Mother asked softly with a demanding voice

Krishna immediately did his homework and slept on his bed.

This continues for a week and Krishna got used to listen to Mothers stories and once the dinner time was set she shifted the story time just before the bed.

Krishna became so fascinated to mothers variety of stories and eventually goes to bed on time eager to listen to the story every day.

Krishna’s father asked Mother,’ How this change had happened without any shouting, threatening or pampering?

“It’s simple. I was telling him a story whose end will follow the next day i.e the secrets and suspense of the story will be revealed the next day bed time and so he has to wait for one full day to know what happened.” Mother said with a sense of proud and glittering eyes.

Krishna also told me that he was sharing the story to his friends and they all are happy and eager to listen.” Mother explained with a sense of achievement.

By sleeping early at night, Krishna started waking up early in the morning at 6:15 AM and completes his daily chores before time and waits for bus in front of the building. The bus driver was shocked to observe this change.

Picture source-https://www.parentingbookmark.com/resilient-kids/8-secrets-for-raising-a-can-do-kid/

“Staying with your goal for a period of twenty one days and performing the new activity at the same time for each of these days, will insert it into your routine.” – Robin Sharma

This is how Krishna's mother brought him in Discipline☺

“Discipline is the secret to fruitful life” –quoted by Someone

My Friend, A Farmer

In our life, we meet many people and every acquaintance will teach us something.

Someone had rightly said, ' We don’t meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our paths for a reason. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.’

I am so fortunate to have a friend who instilled me to pursue one’s own dreams no matter what.

A person who left his techie job in Swiss-Swedish multinational corporation ABB in Bangalore to pursue his dream which demands complete hard core physical work and no return on investment for at least a year or more. Taking such a bold step is not an easy thing for a family man but my friend Harsha does became A FARMER!

Harsha used to come to Jharsuguda, Odisha, India for testing and commissioning purposes of Rectifiers/Transformers. As I work for the same project, we get to know each other and became good friends in a short period of time.

I was shocked when he said, he is pursuing his dream of Farming but when I saw his pictures which sent to me, I was like completely taken aback.

Before leaving job in ABB

HARSHA, A FARMER

“Make bold moves toward your dreams each day, refuse to stop and nothing can stop you”- Hal Elrod

 I am so proud of my dear friend Harsha!

Thank you so much you are such an inspiration to everyone!          

A beautiful and successful journey of a young man - Office boy to Team Leader!

Although Bangladesh only came into existence in 1971, the land which is today Bangladesh has strong ties to the Middle East.

 Bangladeshis in the Middle East form the largest part of the worldwide Bangladeshi diaspora.

 Bangladeshis who come to the Middle East are primarily guest workers and day laborers.

According to the National Center for Statistics and Information (NCSI), as of November-end, 2016 in Oman, the number of Bangladeshis stood at 694,449, with Indians second highest at 691,775 with the number of Pakistani expats standing at 231,685.

Like other Asian expatriates, Bangladeshi citizens have sought work in the region primarily to send remittances back to their families.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bangladeshis_in_the_Middle_East

https://timesofoman.com/article/99165/Oman/Bangladeshi-expats-overtake-Indians-in-numbers-in-Oman

While I was working for an International Project in 2013, we were given a small room as site office which was near to Pantry. On my first day of office, I was not familiar about the individuals as well as office layout. I remember when I used to pass by the Office pantry for attending the meetings with my manager at Engineer’s office, there was an office boy around 21 years of age,5’6”/ 7’’ height with fair complexion in white shirt with a black jacket and blue pants often greeting me with a pleasant smile ‘Good Morning Maidam’.

I , in return used to greet him back by saying ‘Good Morning’ and rushed to the meeting. When I came back to office, I went to pantry and made myself a cup of tea. There he is! Standing and making tea for all other office staff.

Hi! I said, and introduced myself “My name is Anuradha. What is your good name?

He replied ‘Everyone calls me Mitoo. You may also call me with this name. No problem’

Hmm.. Mitoo..!! I repeated.

Mitoo means sweet and easy to pronounce too. Nice name.!!

I made my cup of tea with milk and tea bag and went back to my room.

I took a sip while checking my emails.

Yuck. I didn’t get the mixture right in my tea cup it seems, immediately went to pantry and emptied the cup.

‘What happened Maidam?’ Asked Mitoo

Nothing, just I didn’t liked my tea, added more sugar it seems.

‘I will make it for you Maidam. ‘Said Mitoo

Umm. It’s ok let it be. Pls give a cup of green tea, will try this.

Ok. Here you go maidam.

Thanks Mitoo!! That’s so nice of you..!!

By the way , you should say ‘Madam’ but not ‘Maidam’…

Yes Madam!

I took my cup and went to my room and had a sip, it’s very bitter in taste, may be its my first try of having green tea.,,but thought somehow better than the tea which I made with milk.

Daily morning I used to have green tea thinking “this is better than any other tea and coffees in the pantry.”

After a month, I observed that I was having green tea happily without any muttering …Then I realized that as Robin Sharma, a Motivational speaker said if anything you want to bring in habit, you need to practice it for 21 days without a miss.

I guess, this worked for me and having green tea became my routine.

One day, my friend Cumhur Samiloglu, a Turkish national and myself came to pantry to have some coffee.

Mitoo greeted my friend ‘Guneydin’ (in Turkish)

Gunaydin! Nasilsin( how are you)? Said Cumhur

Iyiyim sen nasilsin( Am good how are you?) My friend replied back.

I was shocked and didn’t expect that Mitoo speaks Turkish language. I asked him ‘You are Bangladeshi. Right?’

‘Yes Madam’ he replied.

Mitoo, I can understand when you speak hindi, as there are many Indians around and on top of it, most of us are fascinated by Bollywood movies  , so learning Hindi is not a big thing for Bangladeshis. 

But, how come Turkish? I asked him with ounce of curiosity and bewildered expression on my face.

He replied with a gentle smile on face and said “English (Gora/white) people, Turkish people also comes to pantry for tea/ Turkish coffee/water etc.. As, I am into hospitality sector, I must greet and treat well with my customers and people around with  always gentle a smile and respond to their questions. But, when I came here for the first time, I was not able to understand neither English nor Turkish and in this office wing these Goras and Turkish nationalities people are more compared to other nationalities. Therefore, I don’t have any option left, and moreover, I all the time in the world am simply sitting and have more free time  as there are very few  people now. Later, when the team size increases, more work will be there. So, I started repeating the words they say and next day I used to greet in their language those two lines ‘Good morning and how are you?’  Before they do. That’s it, this was the first step taken in learning different languages.”

‘Hmm. Tusi Great ho Mitoo!’ I was so impressed and appreciated him.

What is your education qualification Mitoo?

I didn’t study much and left school, he replied keeping the same smile on his face.

So, how many languages you can speak fluently?

Bengali, my mother tongue, Hindi, Arabic, Turkish and English.

Umm..what next ?

Nothing madam just waiting for the right time to get into a big company as I am very much interested to do computer job.

I am learning computer from my supervisor too.

Good Mitoo. Keep it up. Always Aim high!

Cumhur said ,’ büyük düşün’ (Dream Big Mitoo) and left .

What else you are doing after office hours?

Daily after office hours, I go to gym as we have few gym equipment’s in the labor camp.

Good Mitoo. It seems your company takes good care of you people. Nice.

Keep up the good work!

I came to my office room and thought like ‘If one can dream of something and have faith in it, there will be nothing to stop him. A person just by repeating and interacting with people learned 3-4 languages with such an ease. Truly Commendable! These are the people who have real thirst to achieve something great in life and ultimately become successful one day by working for their dream each day’

Years later when the project is nearing to close, Mitoo’s manager asked him to attend the interview which was happening for airport services. And, he was one of the ten or fifteen candidates selected out of 200 people because of his welcoming attitude, good personality and English language which he picked up in all these years. He joined the new company and they have given him necessary training to perform his works and groomed him further. By knowing his language skills, his Manager in the new company asked him to lead the team!

This is the short story of Mitoo! Which certainly inspired me a lot and I strongly believe It’s an inspiration to many people who often feel that they have not studied much..they don’t have educational degree..blah… blah giving excuse all the time, this story of Mitoo shows that if you have a strong desire to achieve something in life, something bigger…then you yourself will have to do something about it rather than ignoring your true potential and snubbing the most precious asset available with you on earth i.e “Time & Health”.

The small steps which we take to learn something new in day to day life either for fun or for acquiring new knowledge whatever the reason may be, these will help us in one or the other way in reaching out to our goals!

Keep doing the things you love and have fun! One day opportunity will knock on your door! So keep learning..!!

A perfect morning with my friend!

Today 8th November 2019, my friend Ramya and I together  set and achieved a target ,a WALKATHON  from my apartment in Al Khuwair  to Qurum  Hayat beach and  back to Al khuwair covering 10.44 km    

Started early morning at 5.30 AM dawn enjoying the beautiful weather, allée of trees on both sides of the road, watching those  welcoming beautiful flowers ,well maintained roads without any trace of trash, picturesque landscape, everything looks perfect.

Felt an abrupt  change in weather by a  kind of drizzle touching our feet, but it was sprinklers which commenced their job of keeping the grass moist.

Between, need to cross the road to reach the destination. no one on the road , just two of us in the junction of four roads. It's a strange and happy feeling because daily we used to be surrounded by people , vehicles and the busyness of life but at this moment it was an experience of serene surroundings and tranquility.

Finally  reached the beautiful beach by 6.20 AM. Felt a kind of achievement.

Sat on a bench relaxing and observing the beautiful Arabian sea and surroundings.

One  Omani family arrived,spread their mat ,chairs and enjoying the good weather having  Karak chai /Omani coffee,  there are walkers, few joggers , everyone are in their own way of feeling content.

On the way back home, we had a delicious breakfast in the  French Bakery!

Finally concluded the Walkathon reaching the apartment.

A perfect morning with my  Friend Ramya !

This is a great  "Ladies day out" idea!   Isn't it?

Overcoming Pike Syndrome!

My friend Manasa, she is very pretty has thick and silky hair that hangs a little bit below her shoulders and few hair hangs on one side of her face which gives a good look and prettier like Vidya Balan in ‘Lageraho Munnabhai’  movie. 

In college we were group of friends and used to call her ‘Beauty ‘and used to tease her a lot and had lots of fun especially in the hostel. She is very sportive, beautiful, intelligent, fun and full of life. She used to work in Hyderabad for a construction firm before leaving to USA after marriage and has two kids Sanvi (8 year old) and Anand (6 year old).

She used to tell me that ‘She is Desi and her kids are Angreji’. 

When I asked her about this, she said,’ they born in Chicago and speaks English. Even when she insisted to learn Telugu, her mother tongue they say ‘Chill mom’.

One day, she told Sanvi to learn dessert names in Telugu in a hope of cropping an interest for language.

Hmm ‘okay Mom’ said Sanvi.

She showed a ‘Laddoo’ and ask her to repeat the name Laddoo

Sanvi said ‘Laadoo’.

Sanvi repeated ‘Laadoo’ irrespective of her efforts. Finally Manasa said to herself if I do this more, it looks like I am gonna forget Telugu. Better I should think something innovative to teach them the language.

Poor girl…. her efforts are ON even today.

She called me one day and said ‘Anu I need your help’.

What happened Manasa ? Is there any good news of third baby? Do I need to do baby sit?

Umm….nothing like that. Baby sit is not an easy job dear. It will be a roller coaster ride with my kids and you will run away in few days…

Hmm….

Jokes apart, what’s the matter dear? Is everything alright?

Yes Anu. Just want to share with you my feelings and thoughts.

Hmm.. go ahead  I am all ears!

‘It’s been more than 7 years coming to States and I didn’t do anything to upgrade my knowledge and skills. I prepared for TOEFL and GRE to get admission in to MS when I came here in 2008, somehow it didn’t materialize and now I am feeling like I am where I was then when I left Hyderabad. I had such a long gap from work & studies and lost touch what can I do now?

It’s not like for the first time I felt this, almost every year I feel like filling up the form of admission in spring or Autumn but...

I feel like still I have some more time as kids need to understand and do their works by their own and of course I don’t have any regrets that I had given entire time to the family as Family is my biggest strength.

But now I feel yes it’s time I want to push myself and need to stop further postponing enrolling in to MS but not happening. Suggest me few  meditation courses or something as my mind is continuously thinking about this and struggling with me , I feel like depressed or something which I am not sure what it is and  am not at all feeling good..."

She poured her heart out but I don’t know how to console her. Somehow I said, ‘you should try Raja yoga and google it for meditation centers which are there in Chicago near to your place. Also, you may try in you tube for meditation courses.’

I remember saying, 'listen to music and busy yourself by doing something u like painting, fitness etc...'

Anu I am not interested in any of these things...just I want to calm down my mind...

I was in touch with her for some days on and off giving moral support and somehow we got busy in our lives and lost touch.

After an year, She called and said she got admission in Loyola University Chicago

Wow dear..I am so happy for you. How come you did this?

Manasa said, ‘Anu, I just told to myself loudly that,’ I can do it; I will do this and no more procrastination. This is my Decision’.

Bob Proctor, Motivational Speaker in one of his videos explained that

 First step is ‘Make the decision and be there. And that’s really what you have to do’.

‘The second you make a decision, you flip your brain on to a different frequency and you start to attract things to you that you'd never get without making the decision.’

“You are the only problem you will ever have and you are the only solution. Change is inevitable, personal growth is always a personal decision.” – Bob Proctor

This is all I did Anu and now I am where I wanted to be. I am Happy and content now. This principle applies to any circumstance, anything you want to achieve.

Finally, she had broken her glass barrier and took the first step of realizing her potential. No more a surrendered Pike.

I am trying my best to break the glass ceiling? Are you ?

Pike syndrome

You may have heard of the famous research experiment where a northern pike (a fish) was placed in one-half of a large aquarium, with numerous minnows swimming freely (and visibly) in the other half of the glass divided tank.  As the pike became hungrier, it made numerous unsuccessful efforts to eat the minnows, but only succeeded in battering its snout against the glass divider.  Slowly the pike learned that reaching the minnows was an impossible task, and simply gave up.  When the glass partition was removed, the pike surprisingly didn’t attack the minnows even though they swam freely around the tank.

Many of us fail to push past our self-imposed barriers of limitation.

Awareness is the first step.

Bibliography :

Source of my inspiration: My friend Nishant

https://www.annegradygroup.com/are-you-a-victim-of-the-pike-syndrome/